Monday, November 30, 2009

Bullying

This year I am at a different school from the school where I taught for the past few years. Some of my students from my first school still enjoy keeping in touch with me, and I am often delighted to receive letters or emails from them. It is exciting to hear how they are doing and how they are growing as individuals.

Lately, though, I have received some troubling and concerning emails from one of my students from last year. He is currently in the 6th grade at my old school and was just moved into an Advanced Work class. When you read his writing, please know that he is an English Language Learner - both of his parents are only fluent in Vietnamese.

A few weeks ago I received this email:

Dear Ms. H,
Can I tell you a story? A mouse goes to school and he gets bullied. HE wants to tell the teacher but he was afraid that he is a snitch and get hurt more. What should he do?


I responded but didn't hear back for awhile, so I wrote to check in. Today I received two emails from him. This was the first:

As the mouse continue on his journey, he finally came up with a plan. What if he avoid the bullies. The next day, he come up with excuses to leave the classroom so he don't encounter any bully. When he did this his grades start to drop. His parents wonder why so they called the teacher. His mom and dad thinks that he is skipping classes and..........

That was where the email ended. Minutes later, he sent this to me:

Dear Ms. H,
I wrote a poem for homework in ELA. Do you think that this is good?

As you can see
I am cheerful and happy
No other feelings inside me
But the truth is
I am alone
Hiding my feelings as the day go by
Living it again and again
No one to share the truth with
I am alone
Even with people by my side
No one to speak to
Not even one that is trustworthy
I am alone
Alone in the dark
Waiting to go to the light
With people who understands
The feeling inside of me
I am alone


My first advice was for him to find a teacher in the school who he feels he trusts and can talk to about what's happening with the bullying interactions. Since I'm not there and don't know who is bothering him and when, I'm not sure how to help. As of now, I don't think that he's spoken to anyone about it.

A week ago I contacted a veteran teacher at the school who is not this child's teacher, but a person who I feel is experienced and sensitive to children's needs. I have just sent him these new emails that I received. However, I'm feeling worried and concerned about this child who was new to my school last year. He arrived bright-eyed and smiling. He was happy and engaged, and so very, very bright. He was thoughtful and aware, and invested in learning and being a positive member of our learning community. Though I saw him struggle at times socially last year, I did not see anything of this magnitude.

I am so worried about his heart and mind. I am worried about him feeling alone in the world. I am worried that there is nothing I can do that will truly help.